How to Bring up a Child in Ten Days
by vain-princess
Summary: Lily. James. Married. Child. These are the words I never thought I'd hear in the same sentence, and yet...Yes, I'm James Potter's wife for ten days! My living nightmare has only just begun...and I'm only sixteen!RR
1. he's in her class!

**How to Bring up a Child in Ten Days**

**Summary -** Lily. James. Married. Child. These are the words I never thought I'd hear in the same sentence, and yet...Yes, I'm James Potter's wife for ten days!! My living nightmare has only just begun...and I'm only in sixteen!!R/R pls

**Author's Note - **Hi! It's me again!! With another fic! Quite different from the the other ones that I wrote... Welcome to my very _first_ try at HUMOUR!! hehey... so try not to be too harsh and _please_ read and review! The first paragraph is from Lily's POV and the following others are just general POV, k?

Well, hope you'll enjoy! )

**Disclaimer - **Anything you recognise is _not_ mine, else it's mine!

-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-

My name is Lily Evans and I'm a student at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. When I enrolled for my sixth year there, I was envisioning something like studying, moments of fun and laughter with my best friend Lennie Brown, studying, being a model student, more studying, being responsible and...oh yes, some more studying uhm, nerd? Who me?

I was planning a year smooth and calm.

Stupid fate decided otherwise...

Now, have you ever gone "speechless" in your life? One of my friends, Missy Lewis once asked me this question. I replied "no".

Well, ask me again Missy!

-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-

It was Friday and she was in Sociology class, running through her textbook while waiting for the teacher, Professor Lewinsky to arrive, when someone placed his hand on her shoulder.

It made her jump and nearly squeal. She turned around to find a familiar face smirking down at her. 'Wow, so I _do_ have some effect on you then, Evans.'

She glared at her interlocutor as he sat down on the seat behind her. 'What the hell are you doing here, Potter? This is Sociology class.'

'Really?' James Potter asked, frowning slightly as if confused.

'Yeah,' she snapped. 'Divination is down the hall, up the staircase, turn left, walk down the hall and again up another staircase, turn right and up the ladder. Hard to miss. You better hurry up cause Professor Lewinsky will arrive at any moment.'

But instead of leaving, he made himself even more comfortable in his seat. 'Good, if this is Sociology class, I'm in the right room. But hey, thanks for worrying about me.'

'Right cla – _No_,' she said as she understood. 'You are _not_ – you _can't_ be... Potter, y_ou can't be in this class_!'

'And why's that?' James asked calmly.

'Because _I'm_ in it!' she replied. 'You should be with your friends in the Divination Class!'

'I was...until I decided that Divination is just rubbish! I decided to change class,' James said. 'Turns out I'm _interested_ in Sociology.'

'You can't just drop a class like that!' she said. 'Dumbledore – '

'Dumbledore has allowed me to join this class,' James smirked. The Horrible Him waited for a few seconds, as if to relish on the horror written over her face as the information sunk into her. 'I'm in the same class as you Evans, whether you like it or not. So deal with it.'

She was opening her mouth to retort something when Professor Lewinsky came in. Instantly, all the conversations ceased and every student watched silently as the teacher made her way to the front of the room.

The class then started, with Lily sulking in front of James. How _could_ that be? He was her worst nightmare, the dirt underneath her shoes, the knot in the hair that she couldn't disentangle and the Butterbeer stain on her brand new _white_ robe.

And now, she had to share, yet, another class with him. Support him for even more time than necessary.

'It doesn't hurt you when we're in classes like Transfiguration together. So why does it bother you now?' James whispered to her from behind.

'I'm trying to follow,' she retorted. I can't believe it, she thought. Of _all_ classes, he chose this one.

'_Why_?' James insisted.

'Shut up.' she whispered back.

There was a minute's silence and she was gladly thinking she had won this battle. But the next minute, she received a hard poke in her back.

'Ow!' she shouted, looking around at him.

He merely shrugged as if to say that he was innocent but she saw the twinkle in his eyes and his smirk.

'Ms Evans, is there anything wrong?'

She felt her cheeks burn as she stammered an excuse to Professor Lewinsky. She glared at James one last time before turning around in her seat. This just added one more reason on her list entitled "Why I hate James Potter".

'So will you answer now?' James asked her when Professor Lewinsky had indulged into another session of explanation.

'Or what?' she asked.

'I'm sure Lewinsky won't appreciate that you disturb her class twice for nothing,' James answered.

She could almost see him leering behind her. 'Why is it so important to you?' she asked, staring straight ahead of her.

'I just want to know.'

'Fine,' she sighed. 'Ask again?'

'Why does it bother you that we're in this class together when we are in classes like Charms together? It doesn't seem to bother you _that_ much _then_.'

'You really want to know?' she asked. 'Well, it's because these classes that we have together are _obligatory_ – we _have_ to have them together: unfortunately, we're in the same house. But _this_ one Potter. It is a choice. And I can't believe you made the same choice as me.'

'Maybe we think the same,' James said.

She snorted. 'Oh _please_.'

'Why – '

She turned around. 'Potter, shut up, will you? I don't want to have to endure anymore of your little questionnaire okay?' she snapped.

'_Ms Evans_!' she heard Professor Lewinsky hiss behind her.

She winced and turned around to face the teacher. 'I. Am. So. Sorry. Professor,' she said.

'I'm very surprised at you Ms Evans,' Professor Lewinsky said. 'I thought you were the best student but –'

'It's my fault, Professor.'

That surprised her. She turned around to look at James with wide eyes. Had he just said what I thought he did? She thought

He didn't even glance at her as he continued. 'It's my fault if Evans has been disturbing your class. And I'm very sorry about that, Professor.'

Professor Lewinsky glared at James. 'You're Mr Potter, I believe.'

'Yes, Professor,' James replied.

'Good then, since you and Ms Evans seem to be so friendly with each other already –'

That made her speak up. 'We're not _friends_,' she rectified.

Professor Lewinsky turned a stern face at her. She looked so damn like Professor McGonagall right now that she shut up. 'Scuse me Professor,' she mumbled.

'As I was saying,' Professor Lewinsky said. 'Since you two have already bonded so _well_. Why, I think the best I can do for you is to put you two together!'

Lily frowned. '"Put us two together"? What "put us two together"?'

She didn't know what that was about but she didn't _want_ to be with James Potter, in whatever way!

Professor Lewinsky smirked at her. 'Oh yes, I forgot that you were not paying attention.'

If there existed a spell that allowed people to open up the ground and let it swallow them, she would have used it. Oh yes, I would, she thought.

'We will be studying the chapter 'The family' this term, Ms Evans. And what other way of teaching you how to understand each other and how to take care of a family, if not by pairing you up for ten days?'

'"Pairing us up?"' she asked horrified.

'Ms Evans,' Professor Lewinsky sighed. 'This is very simple, really. I am going to assign all of you partners of the opposite sex: you'll be married, and conjure up toy babies. You will be like real families. These babies will be like real ones too: they can real angels and sleep and gurgle, but can also cry and cry and cry. And when they do, you'll have to care for them. The problem will in knowing _why_ they are crying.'

She took out her wand and muttered a spell. A dozen of babies appeared in front of them on the table.

'They are equipped with special sensors and spells have been cast upon them so that no one can jinx them to stop crying or stop functioning, so do not even think of it. Don't even think about letting them cry too, I will eventually know about it. The babies are equipped with a memorising spell that remembers what kind of treatment it was given and how it will react when it will be taken from you Monday next will tell us all about it.

'You'll be given pacifiers, milk bottles and nappy. If the baby cries and you think it needs to get changed, switch nappies. If he really needed changing, it'll stop crying the moment the nappy is changed. Else you'll have to try other things.'

Lily swallowed hard as the horrible truth dawned on her.

'And...I'll have to be doing this with Potter?' she asked in a small voice.

Professor Lewinsky smiled at her. 'You'll have to be doing this with Potter.'

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**Author's Note -**So like it? Hate it? Review pls!!


	2. poor Lily!

**Author's Note - **Oh God! Thank you for all your reviews!!! Thank you, Thank you, Thank YOU!!!! I can't believe you actually liked the first chapter!!! WOW! I mean...**_WOW_**...I feel so..._loved_! lols...

**Disclaimer -** anything you don't recognise is not mine and anything you recognise is mine...oops no it's the other way round: **_anything you don't recognise is mine and anything you do recognise is not mine_**! My wrong...

-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-

She was at loss of words as she stared open mouthed at Professor Lewinsky. How _could_ it be? Damn, that's the second time today I'm thinking this, she thought.

Behind her, she heard James cough. Oh _him_! Lily thought. She could almost make out the wheels of his brain spinning, already devising new and countless ways to nark her.

'Any other questions Ms Evans?' Professor Lewinsky asked.

She jumped and blinked.

'Uh...Y-yes,' she said, finally finding her voice. 'I know that it is...uh, abusive of me to be asking this...but can...would it be,' she let out a hiss of breath and tried to regain control of her mind. 'Would it be possible to... change partners?' she finished in a smaller voice the speech she had started so bravely

Lily crossed her fingers under the table while she waited for an answer. Please, please, please, don't make me do this with him, Professor.

The way the latter looked at her, she almost thought that she'd agree to let her change.

Professor Lewinsky let thirty seconds roll by before answering. Please, she thought, looking at her.

'Changing partners is a "no", Evans,' Professor Lewinsky said, finally. Lily let out the breath she'd been holding. 'Divorce is on the _verge_ of "acceptable"... but, again, bear in mind that marks will be deducted if the marriage is no success: the baby could suffer from that.'

Lily groaned inwardly. Her fate was sealed and there was no changing it.

'Anything else?' Professor Lewinsky asked.

Lily shook her head and looked down, 'no Professor.'

'Good. Then, Lily Evans and James Potter,' she said loudly, and a quill from the teacher's desk magically lifted in the air and started to write.

Professor Lewinsky then started assigning the couples but Lily could not hear anything… not anymore.

This can't be true. Potter, the same pain in the neck she was talking about just earlier was her…_partner_. We're going to have to take care of a _baby_ together, she thought. We're going to be a _couple_ for _ten days._

They couldn't help bickering at each other every two second…which meant she had to prepare a whole _lot_ of retorts for the week to come…

Oh, I can't believe it, she thought burying her face in her hands.

This is really not my day...

'So Mrs. Potter,' she heard him say, close to her ear. 'Got an idea about how we're gonna name our baby?'

She was boiling with anger at him. Of course he'd be glad! This was just another chance for him to torture her even more. She turned her face to him.

'Yeah, an idea, I've got! If it's a boy, I suggest we name him after his father,' she spat.

James looked thoughtful. 'Yeah, James is quite a perfect name, really.'

'No. I was thinking about something along the line of _Dumb_ _Head_?' Lily snapped.

Her anger doubled over when he smiled coolly and shook his dark-haired head while taking a seat next to her. 'Now, now, Evans...I mean _Lily_, you're a Potter now, aren't you?' he smirked. '"Dumb Head Potter" will _not_ do, will it?'

She nodded. 'You know what? I think you are _so_ right: people might confuse the father and the son. How about "Dumb Head Jr."?'

He shook his head chuckling. 'Lily...'

'Don't,' she said, holding up a finger. '_Evans_ is better coming from you.'

'As you wish, _Lily_,' James said. Then he looked at her. 'Oops, sorry, Lily. Darn! I can't stop saying "Lily", Lily.'

Lily glared at him and tried contained her frustration. This boy was really getting to her. How could someone be _such_ a pain???

'So, if it's a girl,' James smiled. 'I think we'll name her after her mother. How about _Hottie-Tempered_?'

If her eyes could, like, flash fire, she would have a very roasted and burnt James Barbecue next to her.

'Potter,' she said through gritted teeth. 'I -'

'Here is your child, Mr and Mrs Potter,' Professor Lewinsky interrupted, smiling first at James, then at Lily. 'Bravo, you are the proud parents of a little boy. He is barely six months old and in great health. I hope you will take good care of him.'

Lily forced a smile at her as she took the baby and the equipment going along with it. 'Thank you,' she said.

The baby was small, like a six month old. He's cute, she found herself thinking.

'Aw, he looks just like me!' James said taking the doll out of her hands.

'Potter, if you didn't know it, that's an insult to the child,' she said.

He glared at her. 'This is no way to talk to your darling husband.'

'You're _not_ my husband!' Lily replied.

'I'm sorry but for the week to come I am, dear,' James smiled.

Arg! How can he be so _calm_? She thought.

Professor Lewinsky asked for their attention back. Apparently, she had just finished distributing the babies. The couples looked at her enthusiastically.

Lily was disgusted. She _could_ have been enthusiastic about this project to, had she not been with _him_. Ugh. This was a nightmare.

'I have already talked about this to all the teaching staff and they have agreed to be co-operative and will allow you to take your children in class.'

The students all nodded.

'Now class, have you all got a partner and a baby?' Professor Lewinsky asked.

_Unfortunately_, Lily thought, glancing at James who was holding the "baby".

There was a mutter of acknowledgement. Professor Lewinsky smiled and raised her wand. 'Then, may the project begin!' she said as a flow of blue and silver sparkles emerged from her wand and went straight into the babies. 'Good luck to all of you!'

Lily sighed as she watched the baby come to life in James hands and as it started to cry. James panicked and trusted the doll back into her hands.

Luck? She thought desperately. What I need is more like a miracle!

-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-

**Author's Note - **Poor Lily... I'm so sorry for what I'm making her go through... And it's just the beginning...(_**shakes head, looking sorry**_)

Thanks to all of you who read and reviewed my story!!

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And to all of you, once again, _thank you!!!!!!!!! _So...hope you liked this chapter...it's pretty short, I _know_. But if you feel like it, review anyways. And if you don't feel like it, well, review anyways! u choose! :-P

hugs!!!


	3. breaking the news to Lennie

**Author's Note - **Woah thanks so much for your reviews...I'm touched really... Uhm, oh yeah, I think I forgot to ask how you'd like them to name their 'baby'...is "Harry" okay for all of you?

**Disclaimer - **I own nothing... but what's mine...go figure

-v-v-v-v-v-v-

Lily was pacing in the dorm that afternoon when Lennie entered the room after a long day in class. They always met there to go for dinner together. Lily looked up and gave her an anxious look.

'Lennie sit down,' Lily said to her best friend.

The lovely blond-haired girl threw Lily a curious look as she put her bag down and she plopped on the couch. Lily continued to pace in front of her. This went on for minutes with Lennie waiting for a word from her best friend.

Nothing.

Finally Lennie sighed and broke the silence. 'Is there anything you'd like to talk about?'

Lily looked at her. 'Oh yes, sit down.'

'I'm already seated Lily,' Lennie said.

'Oh yes, I...uh forgot that you were,' Lily laughed nervously. Then she returned to her pacing.

'What _is_ it Lily?' Lennie asked standing up.

'Lennie,' she said, with the most serious expression ever. 'I'm married.'

Lennie's mouth dropped open, her hazel eyes became wide and she fell onto the couch again. 'M-married?' she breathed out, her voice barely making it out.

'And you won't believe to whom...'

Lennie stared at her in disbelief. 'Surprise me... But then again, I guess nothing's more shocking than...than you being_...married. _Shoot

Lily took a deep breath and quickly said, 'JamesPotter.'

Lennie looked even more surprised than before. 'You're kidding me. Is it April's Fools today?'

Lily shook her head. 'No, I'm married to James Potter.'

'Is...Is it _the_ James Potter that we both know that we're talking about?' Lennie frowned. 'The one you hate?'

'Jet-black hair, deep brown eyes and smile that makes all the girls' head swoon, yes,' Lily said. 'Him.'

'When _did_ you get married?' Lennie asked. 'You're crazy, I thought you were responsible! Wait, I thought you'd marry when you are perfectly grown up! Not when you're not even seventeen yet! _Wait again_,' Lennie said in disbelief. 'I thought you _hated_ James Potter.'

Lily shrugged. 'And that's not all, we have a baby.'

'You _what_?' Lennie shouted.

Lennie was damn shocked, appalled and flabbergasted. Was this really her best friend Lily Evans?

'Yeah,' Lily said casually. 'It's a boy.'

'Lily Potter!' Lennie said. 'If I had the force to get up, I would...I would...' Then she frowned. 'Wait a second. How did you actually _get_ that baby?'

Lily laughed. 'The _normal_ way Lennie! Don't tell me I have to explain this too!'

Lennie had to smile. 'No, I didn't see you getting the huge belly or anything. How did you get it?'

Lily then smiled, rushed to the side of her bed and reached down. Lennie looked at her inquisitively and gasped as Lily showed her a big basket with a baby in it. A _toy_ baby.

'Let me present to you, Dumb Head Jr Potter,' Lily smiled brightly. 'James Potter's and Lily Ev – _Potter's_, I mean, son. And I've got only two things to tell you Lennie Brown. One: don't question about the name, and two: _gotcha!_'

Lily then told her about the project and Lennie cracked up and held her stomach as she laughed. 'God Lily! You gave me the fright of my life! All along I was thinking: who are you and what have you done to my best friend? God...'

Lily smiled at her. 'Sorry, I had to do this. I was so miserable that I thought I could use some entertainment.'

'You're wicked!' Lennie said. 'But congrats, you were really convincing! And you kept _such_ a straight face all along!'

'I know, I'm the best,' Lily said.

'What about that name? Is this his real name?' Lennie asked.

'Oh Dumb Head _is_ his name yes...but I've come to nickname him "Dumbie" too, now that you're asking,' Lily said.

Lennie laughed. 'Sorry Lils, but as your best friend I have to tell you this is a horrid name for such a beautiful boy!' she said looking at the toy.

'Nah, I'm kidding,' Lily said. 'His real name will be Harry James Potter. Guess who chose the middle name?'

'The father?' Lennie chuckled.

'Damn right.'

'Oh and I was meaning to ask you, we're Christening him in the coming week and I was wondering if you'd like to become Godmother?' Lily smiled.

Lennie smiled. 'You must be joking, of course I want to! He's my best friend's son afterall!'

'That's cool then,' Lily smiled. 'Potter will be choosing the Godfather.'

'Why are you still calling him Potter? You're married to him now, which makes you too a _Potter_,' Lennie teased. 'Right?'

'Don't start that with me,' Lily smiled.

They laughed together again and talked about who there guess on the Godfather would.

'Knowing Potter,' Lily said.

'Oh, so you _know_ him? I thought you didn't want to know him.'

Lily glared at her.

'Sorry,' Lennie said. 'Go on.'

She smiled. 'As I was saying, knowing him, it will have to be one of his friends.'

'One of his _best_ friends you mean,' Lennie said.

'Yeah, to name them: Sirius Black,' Lily ticked them off the fingers of her hand. 'Remus Lupin... and Peter Pettigrew.'

'Yeah,' Lennie said. 'I guess it will be one of them too. Oh one question, for Christening, you need a priest right?'

'Yes,' Lily said.

'Do we have a priest in Hogwarts?' Lennie asked. 'Forget that. Do priests that Christen _dolls_ exist _anywhere_?'

Lily shrugged. 'We will just be faking a ceremony. You know, just so we can tell Lewinsky that we took care of our son just as if he were real.'

'Okay,' Lennie said. 'I can't believe I'm going to be Godmother!'

'I can't believe that I, Lily Evans, am married to James Potter ...and that we have a son.' Lily said.

The two girls looked at each other and laughed.

'There is one thing I reproach you though,' Lennie said when they had caught their breathe.

'What is it?' Lily asked.

'How come I did not get invited to the wedding?' Lennie smiled.

-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-

**Author's Note** - There is the end of this third chapter. Really sorry if you didnt like it....:-(

**libi** - uh, thanks!

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**centaur219** - Hey! Thanks so much for reviewing again! I'm so very happy that you like my story! thanks, thanks and thanks!

**praesul femella** - hey...okay, that's done...But I don't know, Lily's not going to call him "Harry"...she'll be calling him "Dumbie"...and...oh well...

**jasper-the-talking-cow** - haha, yeah...poor Lily...thanks for reviewing! And I'm sooo happy you like my story!

**Red-Emerald** - Yeah, well, before being "wonderful parents" they'll have to go through...uhm..._much..._lol...thanks for reviewing once again! And NO, they won't divorce...yay!

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**SCHOOLSUCKZ** - I so totally agree with you: School really sucks! Lol...Well, thanks for reading and reviewing...and tell your friend, Jenna that I'm glad she likes it!

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**sirius'sheelah** - I'm not really great with kids either, mind you! Lol...I'll use my experience as a "baby-sitter" for this fic!:D haha, this should be a great laugh...Yeah, I'll put as much of Sirius and Remus in it if I can...and yes, I hope I don't get writer's block too...ewww, get away from me writer's block!!Lol... Thanks again for reviewing!

And once again, thanks so much for reading!! Hope you like this chapter...The next one is supposed to be a teeny bit longer....Oh, and yeah, tell me again if "Harry" is a good name for the baby!!!!!!!!!!!! I'll change it if it needs to be changed....K?

Well, see you... Hugs...


	4. great? start

**Author's Note** - Hey! OMG thanks so much for your reviews! ) I'm really happy that you enjoy it! Happy, happy, happy!)

**Disclaimer** - I'm getting tired of this, really, here goes: I own nothing...

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Lily had conjured a basket (**a/n:** think car-seat…or sort of…) to put the baby in it and she arrived in the hall that night, holding it in her hands. Several heads turned to look at her. The Slytherins sneered at her and she saw loads of people whisper.

Sighing, she plopped on the bench. Dumbie started to wail.

'Oh no,' Lily said. 'Not now, I'm gonna eat now, Dumbie.'

She sighed and reached out to take the baby in her arms. 'What is it?' she said, lulling it to calm it down.

After a few minutes, Dumbie stopped crying. Lily smiled at it. 'There!' She gently placed it in the basket. 'Can I eat now?' she asked him. 'Huh?'

Then she realised she was talking to a doll. 'Okay, I think hunger is getting to my head.'

'Hey Evans!' she heard. Her head swivelled to the Slytherin table. 'I need a babysitter for my little brother, want the job? Oh I forgot...I don't allow Mudbloods in my house.'

And as if that were funny, they laughed at Lucius Malfoy's joke.

'I hate it,' she said through gritted teeth to Lennie as she glared at Malfoy. 'I hate him.'

'Just don't bother,' she replied, squeezing her friend's arm. 'It's no use.'

'You're right,' Lily said sitting upright and putting the basket next to her on the wooden bench. As soon as she put it down, it started to cry again.

Lily took the child. 'What now?' she asked frustrated. 'Change of nappy? Ugh, no, not on the table where I'm gonna eat...Hungry?'

She took the milk bottle and stuffed it into the doll's mouth. Then the doll made sounds like it was drinking. 'So that was it, you _were_ hungry.' Lily said.

After fifteen minutes, the doll had fallen asleep and Lily gently put it back into the basket. _At last_, she thought. She could not keep ignoring the grumbling of her stomach.

'Done!' she turned back to Lennie and saw that the plates had already filled with food and that they had started to eat. So much for me, Lily thought as she started to serve herself.

'Do you realise that I'll have to take care of it while I eat?...And _all_ the time, actually?' Lily shook her head. 'No more free time, I'll always have to be there and present.'

Lennie shrugged. 'That's what being a mother is about.'

'Please,' Lily told her. 'Next time I tell you I want a child, remind me of this. Oh and next time I want to marry, make sure it is _not_ with James Potter.'

Lennie laughed and looked over Lily's shoulder. 'Speaking of whom,' Lennie jerked her head towards someone behind her. 'Here comes your husband.'

'Lennie, he is _not_ my _husband_, okay?' Lily hissed.

'Speaking about me?' James grinned sitting next to Lily.

'Ha! Sorry Potter but we have better things to talk about than you,' Lily snapped.

James ignored her. 'So how is the little Monster doing?' James smiled reaching inside the basket and grabbing the doll roughly.

Lily looked at him horrified. 'Potter! _No!_'

Too late, the doll started wailing.

Lily sat there frozen, glaring at James. This _has_ to be a joke. I _have_ to be hallucinating.

James was desperately trying to make it shut up by waving it in the air and pulling faces. 'Wohoo! Hey shhh...please, Harry, sssshhhhhhh...'

'I had a hard time trying to make him sleep you stupid git!!' Lily said, putting emphasis on each word.

James looked at Lily. 'Oops.'

Lily turned to Lennie. 'Hold me back...Hold me back or I'm gonna _murder_ him,' she said through clenched teeth.

Lennie reached out for her arm and gave her a squeeze. 'Calm down, Lils, violence will lead to nowhere.'

Lily heaved a sighed. 'When Potter's around its hard to keep that in mind." She turned back to James who was still holding the crying doll. 'Do what you have to do, Potter, but make it shut up.'

James looked at her with pleading eyes as the doll wailed and wailed louder and louder. Lily shoved the Baby Kit in his hands and took back her spoon, royally ignoring him.

A few minutes later and the doll was still bawling. Lily ignored it and stuffed a spoonful of pudding in her mouth. _There's no way I'm helping him out. Dumbie was perfectly sleeping and he had to go and wake him up!! It's _his _problem and I'm _not_ helping him..._no

After a few minutes, Lennie gave her a gentle shove. 'Hey, you know,' she whispered. 'This crying is becoming very annoying.' She said, rubbing her ear and jerking her head towards James.

'No,' she hissed back. 'I'm not moving. He's got to learn too. I'm not going to do _everything_ myself, will I?'

'Yeah, but you could show him.'

'I don't wanna _show_ him,' Lily protested.

'But you have to if you don't want to do everything yourself.' Lennie told her.

Lily sighed and glanced at James. He had pushed aside the plate and forks and was changing its nappy. Well, at least trying.

He was even having a hard time taking off the nappy off the doll and was catching the attention of everyone as they stopped eating to look at him.

Lily sighed and pushed his hands away, taking the baby in her hands. 'Not on the _table_ where everyone is eating Potter. That's not..._hygienic_!'

'If you've got a better idea,' James snapped. 'Be my guest.'

Lily reached out and grabbed the pacifier. She stuffed it inside the doll's mouth and it instantly stopped crying.

-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-

Before going to sleep, Lily met James again in the Common Room.

'There!' Lily said. 'Your turn to take care of it. It's been a real angel. I've just changed it, I've fed it all you have to do now is make it sleep again.'

James took the basket Lily was trusting at him and looked at her. 'Make him sleep?'

'Yes, Potter, sleep, babies have to sleep,' Lily said to him. 'I'll take it back in the morning and then you'll have it in the afternoon, okay?'

James nodded, 'Okay,' he said warily.

Lily looked at him and shook her head. 'Oh and have you made a decision about the Godfather of Dumbie?' she asked.

'Harry,' James told her. 'His name is _Harry_.'

'You call him whatever you like, every mother has a pet name for their child,' Lily told him. 'And instead of just calling it 'Darling' or 'Baby', I'm being original! No one will ever call his child "_Dumbie_"!'

'I wonder why,' James muttered under his breath rolling his eyes.

Lily ignored him. 'So? About that Godfather?'

'Well, I'm going to take _Harry_ to choose which one he likes best now,' James said putting great emphasis on _Harry_.

'Okay, whatever. Still meeting Sunday afternoon to plan the Christening, aren't we?'

'Yes, of course, honey,' James smirked.

Lily glared at him. 'Don't make me swear in front of that child, Potter.'

'What did I say?' James asked playing innocent.

Lily ignored him. 'Here is his blanket,' Lily said showing him a gold and red blanket with _Harry James 'Dumbie' Potter_ written just under the Gryffindor logo. 'It will keep him warm all through the night and he'll be happy thinking that his mother made it for him.'

James stared at it. 'You made that?'

'I did!' Lily said brightly.

'Well, it would be better without that "Dumbie" name,' James said taking out his wand. 'Let me fix that.'

'No!' Lily said.

'Yes!' James retorted.

"No you're _not_!"

"Yes I _am_!"

Lily shoved the blanket behind her. 'You're not changing _anything_ about this blanket! I made it! Go make yourself another blanket!'

'I _will_ change this.' James insisted, pointing his wand at her. 'Come on, you're not going to let my son sleep in there!'

'_Our_ son, Potter!' Lily said. 'It's _our_ son!'

At that James lowered his wand and that oh-so-detestable-smirk of his appeared. 'You're right. _Our_ son. You know, I'm glad you pointed that out Lily. So, when are we going to work on getting _our_ son a sibling?'

Lily groaned and shoved the blanket in James' hand.

'And don't you dare change what's written on it!' Lily shouted at him before whirling around and walking to the staircase that led to her dorm.

'Or what exactly?' James asked.

'Or you'll be very sorry for having married me in the first place, Potter,' Lily said as she walked up the stairs.

-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-

**Author's Note** - And this marks the end of the chapter! Like it or hate it? TELL ME!

**crouchintiger - **What's gonna happen between Lily and James? I wish I could tell, but that would ruin everything...But I guess you have a pretty good idea, don't you? hehe...thanks for reading and reviewing!

**cheesefan **- Woah, thanks so much! I'm so glad you like it and I hope I won't deceive you...I couldn't bear it if i did...Thanks for reading and reviewing!)

**the-power-of-love - **Thanks you very much for reading and reviewing once again...

**centaur219 **- I hope you like this chapter too...Thanks for reading and reviewing! Luvies...

**SCHOOLSUCKZ **- Thanks very much for the list of names...I too don't think that they'd name their child "Harry" after they'd had it for a doll...That's why I was not so sure...But as **sumrandumperson** pointed out, they could name Harry remembering this class...Oh well, I don't know...I kept the name Harry, but I hope you don't mind and will keep reading! Thanks for having read this chapter and for reviewing!

**sirius'sheelah **- Yeah if one of my friends told, I'd beat her to a pulp, scratch her eyes out and break all the bones of her body...and if she's still alive, i'd kill her...LOL, only kidding...( _note to my friends_: heard me guys? only kidding!) But I'd definitely, definitely be pissed off…ask for an explanation and she'd better have a good one, a really good one.. GOD, why do I keep getting off track? It was just to thank you for reading and reviewing! ) so, uhm, thanks...

**hikaru - **Haha, I swear to you that it was a really funny one! haha... Thanks for reading and reviewing!

**PurpleClayandPinkRedLace - **Hey! Thanks for dropping by! I'm happy that you enjoy reading it! And I hope you'll keep doing so in the future and that'll you'll still like it! Thanks for reading and reviewing!

**sumrandumperson - **Thanks for your opinion! I think that I agree with you...THANKS!

**Red-Emerald - **Yeah, Lily has a friend! And yes again...you guessed right! ) Haha, and good joke...D I had to think really hard to come up with _Harry_! _Really_!...Thanks for reading once again!

**megan - **Thanks for reading and reviewing!!!)

**James-RoxMySox - **Thank you very much, you don't know how much I was touched when I read your review...)

**Mistress del Mare - **Thanks so much for reading n reviewing! I am so glad you liked it...

**eleira312 - **I think she's funny too! D Thanks for reading and reviewing!

**jasper-the-talking-cow - **Thanks so much!

**anafics - **Thank you...I think I like it a lot too!D lol...thanks a lot for reading and reviewing...

Well thanks for dropping by once again...

Oh and I have a pretty bad news...I've got really, and I mean really important SC/GCSE/O-Level...whatever you call it exams coming up in less than one month and revision will take a lot of my time...

I mean _everyone is expecting me to succeed and I'm stressing the hell out because I'm afraid I won't even _pass_ these exams..._( I'm really dumb at school I swear, and I have to revise, revise and revise cause I don't want to let my parents or anyone down...

But I'm afraid I'll have to let you guys down for the coming month and I won't get to update or write until...until at least _November_...Don't look at me like that guys, _please_...I am really sorry...Really, really, really, _really..._

I hope you'll understand and be patient and wait for me and...keep on reading...Cause writing this story will be useless if no one's gonna read.. Thanks...

I hope you liked this chapter and will wait patiently for the next one...until then....

hugs...


	5. the christening!

**Author's Note** – Hey Guys! I'm baack! I'm officially on holidays!!! Well, that was since the 19th of November… And I'm sorry I didn't write earlier but _there_…I have a fresh, LONG, new chapter for you! It's at least eight pages long!!! So I hope you'll like it! This one isn't really funny… we're going further into the 'romance' and 'seriousness' part of the story… I'm sorry about those who wanted more humour but I just went through exams (like maths, _additional_ maths, economics, and blah blah blah) and I have to admit my sense of humour system ain't really looking that good. Anyway… on with it. I won't keep you long!

I won't be able to do individual thank you' s to you cause if I do, I'd spend another day writing it and it will be another day that you'll have to wait…

**JUST A GREAT BIG HUMONGOUS ENORMOUS THANK YOU FOR ALL THOSE WHO REVIEWED AND READ AND WAITED!!! **

**Disclaimer** – I own nothing…

-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-

Early Sunday morning, Lily woke up to the bawling of Dumbie. She sighed and sat up in her bed. All night long, all he had done was cry…cry…and _cry_.

_I think I'm starting to understand why Potter insisted on me keeping him for the night_, she thought rubbing her tired eyes.

"Lily," Lennie moaned from under her pillow. "Make him shut up."

Lily looked around at the dorm and saw that almost every one of her roommates was sleeping with her head under her pillow.

Lily threw the covers off her and sat on her bed for a few more minutes, trying to find the courage to get up and care for Dumbie.

_Why should I care for someone who doesn't care if I don't get enough sleep?_ She thought grumpily.

She got up and walked to the crib she had conjured and she cast a dark glare at another crib: a pink one at the other end of the room.

_Cleo's lucky to have one kid who doesn't wail all night long_, she thought. _She's lucky _not_ to be married to Potter. Okay, she's lucky full stop_.

She lifted Dumbie in the air. "What is it now?" she asked softly. "Don't you ever sleep, huh?"

It continued to cry and Lily closed her eyes, took in a deep breath and let it out. _Alright, cool, calm and composed_… She took in another deep breath. _Cool, calm and composed_, she thought as she let out the breath.

She snapped open her eyes and smiled at the doll sweetly. "Now I don't want to hurt you okay?" she said. "Stop crying… please?"

The crying started to subdue and Lily's eyes started lit up with victory. "Ahh, that's better!" she said.

But just as the words made it out of her mouth, Dumbie started crying all over again.

Lily trembled with contained frustration and closed her eyes again. _Cool, calmed and controlled._ Dumbie doubled the volume. _Cool…Calm…and con-trolled, _Lily continued to repeat in her head. _Cool, calm and _– Dumbie tripled the crying.

"I can't take it anymore!" she shouted. "Shut up! Shut up please!"

-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-

"Ah! I slept like a baby last night!" James said as he let himself fall on the grass next to Lily.

Lily glared at him from her slumped position while patting Dumbie. "Glad you did," she muttered. "If only _Dumbie _could _sleep like a baby_!"

James smirked. "Had a 'good' night Lily?"

She gave him a forced smile and thumbs up. "Great!" she said sarcastically.

James ignored her sarcasm and peered at Dumbie into the basket. "Hey little one!" he coaxed. "How are you? Did Naughty Mommy torture you much?"

Lily snorted. "Stop corrupting it Potter! We both know I'm the better parent of us two!"

"Excuse me, but I'm not the one –"

"- who spent the whole night taking care of it!" Lily interrupted. "Now, are you, Potter?"

James glared at her. "We came here to talk about his Christening, not to argue, right?"

Lily shrugged. "Nice attempt at a change of subject."

"_Who is the Godmother_?" James asked pointedly.

"Lennie."

"Oh, great surprise," James said.

"Potter, keep your stupid comments to yourself, thank you very much." Lily said. "Who's the Godfather?"

"Well," James started. "It was a pretty hard choice. Peter said he didn't want to though so that left me with Sirius and Remus. I had to do these 'for and against' lists, you know? Sirius is always so carefree and fun loving. Harry would really have great fun with him… But then again, even though I trust him, he is pretty irresponsible and acts before thinking… Remus on the other hand is really trustworthy. He is calm, gentle and sensible. He would really know how to take care of Harry… But then again, he has this –"

"_Potter_!!" Lily hissed. "I only asked you for the name if the Godfather! Not for the account of how, when and where you ended up with deciding who the Godfather will be!!"

"Sirius."

Lily nodded. "That's really all I wanted to know."

There were a few minutes of silence only interrupted by Dumbie' s occasional gurgling. The two teens were sitting near the lake. Many students were strolling enjoying their free Sunday.

"Where are we doing it?" Lily asked.

James smirked at her. "_It_?"

"My mind doesn't work the twisted way yours does," Lily said. "The Christening. Where?"

"Well…I know this place…" James started after a few seconds.

"I'm listening."

James got up as Lily watched him with a frown. "Where are you going?" she asked.

James smiled at her. Really _smiled_. Lily watched him, suddenly mesmerized. A soft wind was blowing through his unruly sun-kissed black hair and his eyes were shining from the whitish-silvery light reflecting from the lake's surface.

He held out a hand to her. "Come. I'll show you this place," he said.

Lily couldn't do anything else other than reach out her small hand and take his. "Okay, as long as it's nowhere illegal…"

-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-

James led her to someplace she had never, _ever_ been before. _I didn't even know this place existed_! Lily thought as she looked around, her eyes wide with wonder at the gorgeous sight unfolding before her eyes.

It was farther down the lake, quite away from the castle. There was a river flowing into the lake. They went upstream following the twists and turns of the river.

"Wow," Lily let out. She gently placed Dumbie's basket on a stone carved like a round table and looked around.

They were in a place surrounded by trees and bushes and plants. There were some flowers from which shimmering and bright colourful sparks occasionally spurted out of the flowers. The thing that made this place so calm and enchanted was the waterfall tumbling down. The sound was not of loud splashing water, but harmonious.

"This is… _beautiful_," Lily whispered.

"I know," she heard James say from behind her.

She jumped – she had almost forgotten that he was there – and turned around only to find him staring at her. She blushed slightly and hoped he couldn't see that. Not taking chances, she turned around again.

"So this is how you 'wow' them all?"

James frowned. "I don't understand."

"You're numerous girlfriends. This is how you enthrall them?" Lily asked, still not turning around.

A minute's silence followed her question.

"You're the first girl that I've brought here." James finally said.

Lily turned around, surprised and stared at James with wide eyes. Surprised, yes, but _pleasantly _surprised. "Really?"

James nodded as he took a wary step towards her. "Really."

Lily shook her head and looked at the ground. "You're kidding me. Bet you tell that to everyone."

James reached out and lifted her chin up to make her look at him. "I'm damn serious here Lily."

Lily's breath caught in her chest. She had never known that James had so beautiful eyes. They were not plain brown, like she thought they were. Around the pupil, there was a thin ring of dark chocolate brown with a sort of uneven edge… then most of his eye was a lighter brown, with a really, really thin ring of dark brown around it.

Come to think of it, nothing was actually _plain_ about James Potter.

Lily jerked away at these thoughts and ran a hand through her flame red hair.

"How do you know this place?" she asked with the most casual voice she could muster up as she pretended to be really, _really_ interested with the works on Dumbie' s basket.

"Oh… I have connections…"

"I'm your…'_wife'_." Lily said. "You can tell me!"

James smiled. "Thought you didn't want to be my wife."

"But I am for a week," Lily said, granting him a small smile.

_Might not be as bad as I thought it would to be his _wife, she thought suddenly. Then she shook her head. _Am I okay? Must be this place. Yes, this place is making think of weird things!_

She decided turn back to 'normal mode' again – or at least tried to.

"Uhm… so we'll christen Dumbie here?" she asked.

"If you want to."

Lily looked around. "When?"

"Tuesday?" James suggested. "I have Quidditch practice tomorrow."

Lily nodded. "Tuesday is great. Around four?"

James agreed.

"Okay, so we'll meet here at four on Tuesday with your friends and Lenny," Lily recapped. "We'll do our sort of 'ceremony' and everything will be alright."

James nodded. "So I keep _Harry_ for tonight?"

Lily blinked. "Who's – " Then she remembered that Dumbie was in fact 'Harry'. She handed him the basket. "Yeah of course. I'll have it tomorrow afternoon so that you can practice for Quidditch then."

"That's cool." James said.

-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-

The day of the Christening soon arrived… and it was quite chaotic. Lily didn't know why, but it was.

Maybe because she was very impatient about Dumbie's christening. _Okay, and also because of these silly thoughts I'm having about James! I mean _Potter She rectified. _Whatever…_

The thing was, this place James had shown her was pretty much was most enchanting scene she'd ever seen! And also, the fact that _she_ was the _first_ girl he had brought to there… it touched her.

_Oh well, I'm his wife,_ she thought._ Maybe it's his way of thanking me to put up with him! And also for giving him a beautiful baby boy! Oh gosh, I'm scaring myself now…_

She had woken up very early and had conjured several little outfits for Dumbie. She placed them carefully on her bed and then stood before them, trying to make up her mind about what it should be wearing.

Munching on her lips, she glanced at each outfit.

Then taking a deep breath, she marched across the room to Lennie's bed. Then she poked the latter's shoulder. "_Lennie_!" she whispered.

She waited for a second, but nothing.

She poked her shoulder harder and said louder, "Lennie! Wake up!"

But Lennie merely turned around in her bed and brought the covers higher up over her head.

Lily sighed. "Fine," she said walking away. Then she abruptly whirled around and jumped on her friend's bed. "Lennie wake up! There's fire!"

Her friend gave a squeal and threw the covers off her and rushing out of bed. Then she found Lily laughing.

"That's very funny," Lennie groaned.

"It is, you should have seen your face!" Lily laughed, but then grimaced as her other roommates '_shhhh'ed_ her.

"Lily, it's still _five_. Let me sleep, will you?" Lennie sighed as she dropped her head against her pillow again.

But Lily grabbed her hands and pulled her out.

"You've got to help me," she said.

"Help you what?"

"Help me choose."

"Help you choose what?" Lennie asked.

"Choose an outfit for Dumbie," Lily said, dragging her to her bed.

"Lily, it's just a doll," Lennie told her. "You tore me from my _wonderful_ dream to play dress up with your doll?"

"The doll that's supposed to be my son, Lennie," Lily pointed out. "The son that will make me get a good grade."

Lennie nodded and glanced at the bed. "Holly _crap_!" she let out. "Lily, you're crazy."

"So, you are to help me choose from these," Lily said gestured to the clothes. "I conjured them up, aren't they cute? Problem is I don't know which one is the best."

"Of course you won't know, there are dozens of them," Lennie said. "You know, he's still small, he won't know what he's wearing and I doubt he cares."

"Maybe, but I want it to be the best-looking doll - boy around," Lily said.

Lennie smirked. "Like his father?"

Lily nodded. "Like his f– wait a second," she playfully pushed Lennie. "_No_."

"Whatever," Lennie smiled.

Then the two of them spent the next minutes choosing an outfit for the baby. It was not easy.

After thirty minutes…

"This one is cute," Lennie said.

"Too red," Lily replied.

"How about this one?"

"Too frilly."

"And this one?'"

"But this one's cute too," Lily said pointing to another one.

"_Okay_," Lennie dropped the outfit she was holding in her hand and grabbed the one Lily was pointing at. "How about…this one?"

"Now that I'm thinking about it, this one too… it's too…sort of _girly_. It's a boy after all."

Lennie sighed and plopped on the bed. "Okay, I give up."

"Hey you're sitting on the clothes!" Lily hissed. "Get up!"

Lennie got up and took the outfit in her hands. "Hey…this one's good!"

Lily looked at it. It was a white overall with a baby blue shirt on the inside. "Hey, yeah, I didn't notice it."

"Well, that's because –"

"Don't need your comments, Len," Lily said snatching the outfit out of Lennie's hands.

-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-

That afternoon, after double Arithmancy-version-History of Magic, Lily ran to meet Lennie with little Dumbie in her arms.

Lily would have to go there with Lennie and James and the others would meet them there.

Lennie was already waiting for her near the lake. "Still excited?"

Lily nodded. "You'll never actually _believe_ what you're seeing when you see the place James brought me to."

"You've stopped first-naming him now?" Lennie teased.

Lily rolled her eyes at her and quickly changed the subject. "Look at Dumbie! Cute, huh?"

Lennie glanced at him. "Aww… That outfit really _does_ fit him!"

…

…

…

A few moments later, Lennie was standing mouth hanging open as she stared around at the Magical Place. "Wow!" Lennie said.

"I know. That's all I could think for about an eternity when I first saw this!"

They heard the soft rustle of leaves behind them and whirled around to find Sirius, Peter and Remus arrive – without James.

"Where's James?" Lily asked.

"No idea," Sirius shrugged, his hands in his robe's pocket. "Got different classes in the afternoon."

"Oh, maybe there's something retarding him then," Lennie said to Lily.

Sirius smiled. "Hey Lennie, I'm the Godfather," he said. "I presume you're the feminine version of me."

Lennie smiled. "Yeah, if _Godmother's _what you call 'feminine version of you'."

Thirty minutes later…

…And still no James.

"Where _is_ he for God's sake?' Lily asked to no one in particular.

Sirius was leaning against a tree, Remus was lying on the grass alongside Peter and Lennie was sitting with the baby in front of her as she watched Lily pace.

"I think he's sleeping," Lennie said.

"Oh, let me go wake him up and he won't be able to sleep, for like, a whole month, let alone lie down!!" Lily scoffed.

"Huh?" Lennie frowned. "Oh, no! Not James. Dumbie, I think he's sleeping."

Lily approached the basket and leaned over. Sure enough, an even breathing was emanating from it. Dumbie had fallen asleep.

"Here's my theory about James though," Lennie said. "Maybe he got lost."

"Lost?" Sirius said. "Ha! James Potter is the one who discovered this place! He can't be _lost_!"

Lily straightened up. "Well, we've waited. You can't say we didn't. So let's Christen Dumbie and get this over with."

Sirius stood up in his full height. "But the father is not there!"

"The father did not bother to come, did he?" Lily snapped.

Silence.

"That's what I thought," Lily said.

-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-

**Author's Note** – OMG, where _is_ James??????? What happened to him? Hmm… I guess you'll find out in the next chapter…hihi…

Anyway, I've just read this again… to think that you've waited for more than a _month_ for this piece of… _crap_. I'm ashamed. I'm ashamed that that's all I can give you after all this waiting… I'm really sorry for the lack of humour. Really. _Really_.


End file.
